Times...

In the coolest climes
The world turns to meet me
The question is whether I should follow
Whether you would want to lead?

You're soul on show
Eyes burning bright
Quick and lively
Would I be a fool to follow?

Lighting up the dark
Dancing in the wind
Singing in the streets
Why would you want me to follow?

Earworms Part IX

This song is "Effington" by Ben Folds off "Way to Normal". I have to admit it isn't the video I wanted to post (I was looking for "Cologne", but most of the stuff on youtube isn't great quality so this it is). Its a close second I'm liking it at the moment, just a song that screams out at you, granted its with the old double entendre but you know sometimes I'm not sure that that is any bad thing, and I'm a real sucker for his piano playing...

Just a thought...

We all live under the same sky, breathe the same air, walk the same Earth. This little planet is our home, everyone on it is placed together. One collective, boundaries and borders are human concepts, we are all alive on the planet, that is the common link. What we believe, see, feel is modulated by the individual. But everyone is here, and its beautiful.

Stopping for a moment...

Last night I watched the BBC Sports Personality of the Year - it represents sporting achievement in the UK. Amongst all the achievement of the evening was something that moved me greatly. Not because it was a world championship or a great win coming from behind. Every year there is the Lifetime Achievement Award, this year it was awarded to Seve Ballesteros.

I've alluded several times on this blog I'm a bit of a golfer - but Seve was the guy that inspired me to take up the game. The joy, drive and imagination that he played with. Especially in the winning of his majors. Maybe more so it draws sharp comparison with the stories of Tiger Woods at the moment. But in Seve there is still such heart and fight, to fight against the brain cancer that affects him at present. I suppose its a difficult line to draw because there are many people affected by such conditions out of the media limelight (I guess you could add the Tiger Woods incident as well). But I'm choosing Seve simply because of the raw emotion of the guy in what he did and he inspires me every time I go out on the course. Delighted for the guy, and his heart and determination.

Earworms Part VIII

Hot on the heels, as it were. A track I've been listening to a lot recently, an awful lot in fact. Its also not in English which adds to the fun. 'Inní mér syngur vitleysingur' ('Within me a lunatic sings') from the Sigur Ros album 'Með suð í eyrum við spilum endalaust' ('With a Buzz in Our Ears We Play Endlessly'). I simply adore the song, I think its just beautiful. That was before I took a bit of time to look up the lyrics I was going to put the translation but decided against it (its HERE if you were wondering...) - but like I've said with many of this series there lyrics that touched me and I wish that I could have written something similar as its a really great expression!

On a note though supposedly vitleysingur is lunatic but something a little more gentle, more silly rather than lunatic. But wonderful song.

Earworms Part VII

I've wondered about posting this for a bit. But something has kind of clicked with it - its called "I just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You" by Colin Hay, off the Garden State soundtrack (there'll be another one off it soon...). I think its kind of self-obvious in its meaning. I like the song very, much. I've talked in the past about how I'm amazed by the power of music; this one doubly so just because I kind of feel it at the moment...

Questions and Answers

Its a funny thought, I've not posted much actual process in the recent weeks. It isn't that I've not been writing - there's a very long post in my temp folder that is getting reviewed, edited and generally preened - that was never the general plan for the blog as I wanted to write and publish to cut the editing filter out. It may or may not see the light of day, possibly in parts.

But what has crossed my mind as part of it was something I was thinking in the past. Maybe a common topic based around questions and answers. Knowing the questions is the first part. I once thought that knowing the answers would then solve the problem. But by trade I'm at least partially a mathematician and knowing the question and answer doesn't actually help lead to a final solution - remember math problems from school? Knowledge of both parts doesn't actually mean that you could deal with a similar problem again.

My problem? I got diagnosed with depression (many months ago, this blog started long after I'd finished treatment), maybe the knowledge that the black dog could always be there in the future - mistakes made in the past that brought me to this point. Quitting the job relieved a great deal of the problems and let me get myself straight - I can't describe the relief at walking out; I'd never go back to that. The fact that that wasn't it or enough maybe wasn't a shock. But maybe it isn't as easy as that - money isn't everything but a bit of comfort at least allows you to step away when you need.

Why this post? I'm not after sympathy; this blog is here to tell a story, and a personal one from a certain perspective. I don't know what can be defined as an end point, or where that point is. Its a road a lot of people have trod in the past and I have the utmost respect and admiration for them. Maybe some things are personal (and maybe painfully personal). That is the reason photos of me or any direct links don't appear here - possibly I want to distance myself slightly, I'm not quite sure - certainly I have absolutely no intention or wish of offending anyone with my words, that isn't the reason this blog started. But this is the ride and this blog a reflection of it - an accountable journal for thoughts; hopefully good times are ahead, time to make things good!