Questions and Answers

Its a funny thought, I've not posted much actual process in the recent weeks. It isn't that I've not been writing - there's a very long post in my temp folder that is getting reviewed, edited and generally preened - that was never the general plan for the blog as I wanted to write and publish to cut the editing filter out. It may or may not see the light of day, possibly in parts.

But what has crossed my mind as part of it was something I was thinking in the past. Maybe a common topic based around questions and answers. Knowing the questions is the first part. I once thought that knowing the answers would then solve the problem. But by trade I'm at least partially a mathematician and knowing the question and answer doesn't actually help lead to a final solution - remember math problems from school? Knowledge of both parts doesn't actually mean that you could deal with a similar problem again.

My problem? I got diagnosed with depression (many months ago, this blog started long after I'd finished treatment), maybe the knowledge that the black dog could always be there in the future - mistakes made in the past that brought me to this point. Quitting the job relieved a great deal of the problems and let me get myself straight - I can't describe the relief at walking out; I'd never go back to that. The fact that that wasn't it or enough maybe wasn't a shock. But maybe it isn't as easy as that - money isn't everything but a bit of comfort at least allows you to step away when you need.

Why this post? I'm not after sympathy; this blog is here to tell a story, and a personal one from a certain perspective. I don't know what can be defined as an end point, or where that point is. Its a road a lot of people have trod in the past and I have the utmost respect and admiration for them. Maybe some things are personal (and maybe painfully personal). That is the reason photos of me or any direct links don't appear here - possibly I want to distance myself slightly, I'm not quite sure - certainly I have absolutely no intention or wish of offending anyone with my words, that isn't the reason this blog started. But this is the ride and this blog a reflection of it - an accountable journal for thoughts; hopefully good times are ahead, time to make things good!

Earworms Part VI

A special song this one. Hypnotic, brilliant, for me one of the whole packages. Not just the song itself but the setting, especially in this video. I saw Radiohead live last year and they played Everything in its Right Place as part of the set. Live it is thrilling, doubly so with the light show - seeing the scrolling text in the bars was rather mesmerising. The use of electronics (Kaoss pads and delay pedals modifying the sampled vocals) I find fascinating, just for the whole atmosphere it creates!

The tram crash on the way home was less pleasurable, a minor derailment that brought down a couple of poles and very nearly hit Cafe Nero - I remember looking round to see a sign embedded in the door and thinking best not go out that way. But in a way added to the experience, thankfully everyone was fine - but it certainly made a talking point of the gig. This live footage is from Reading this year...

Earworms Part V

I simply adore this track. Its called "A Century of Elvis" by Belle and Sebastian (it uses the backing of "A Century of Fakers" and is on the "Lazy Line Painter Jane" EP), its just such a simple tune with a great story. Its just a wonderful narration of a great story; I considered putting the lyrics here but it has a lovely little twist that gets to me every time.

How to Disappear Completely...

Dublin absolutely fascinated me. I'm eager to go back, though I'd prefer somewhere different to reside as the hostel wasn't great... This photo was taken on St Patrick's Day 2008 looking down towards O'Connell street and the bridge at the bottom. The advantage with the poor accommodation was the motivation to get up and out for coffee and breakfast by myself in the morning, it was great to be out amongst the business traffic in the hustle and busy by myself. Wonderful city!

The photo always made me think of the Radiohead song "How to Disappear Completely", just floating down the Liffey.

Earworms Part IV

Another from 31 Songs that Changed my Life . This time is the funk influenced Brooklyn by Youngblood Brass Band. From the very first time I heard it its a track that just makes me want to get up and dance; so funky and the sounds in the sousaphone solo are phenomenal!

Earworms Part III

This is the first time that I've included one of the tunes from 31 Songs that Changed my Life in Earworms. The tune is Tamacun by Rodrigo Y Gabriela (this performance is from Later with Jools Holland in 2006). Somehow seeing it performed live tops the record, not just because the tempo is up, but seeing performers so into the music for me is part of the joy of watching a performance. Its something that just makes me wish I was better at guitar!

Wish You Were Here

Every so often I look back over these photos, and each time I always see something a little bit new. In a small point of self-indulgence this is one of the very few pictures I've ever actually titled with something more than a bald description of the contents. Its just a reminder of a real chilled out period of time.

I should just add the picture is looking out to the Andaman Sea from Patong Beach on Phuket.